You have probably felt truly betrayed by a loved one.
Someone you trusted, trusted and relied on. And when trust is betrayed it is very painful. It takes a long time to heal.
However! This betrayal... it doesn't just come out of the blue.
It always has its background and indications. We just need to know what to watch for.
An unfortunately common scenario was told to me by one of the girls we practice yoga with. He goes to seek help from a psychologist. He enters the office, sits comfortably. She's worried. She doesn't know what to expect. Has she found the right person? And when the psychologist comes, she starts talking about the previous patient. He presents it in not very pleasant colors.
Explains his diagnosis.
After which she begins to tell how she healed half the city of Plovdiv. In which our girl remembers one of our conversations in the studio. That if a person talks behind other people's back (regardless of whether he is some kind of specialist or just an acquaintance or friend) then sooner or later he will do it behind yours. What our girl immediately told herself is that at the next patient, the psychologist will tell about her.
There are usually symptoms. Betrayal does not come suddenly. There is a way to "catch" it early.
When a person starts talking behind others back in front of you THAT IS THE SUREEST INDICATION THAT SOONER OR LATER THE SAME WILL HAPPEN TO YOU.
If someone talks behind his friends back in front of you, never doubt that he will do the same behind your back. Because this is a pattern of behavior!
Read also: Stop saving your relationship with others. Save your relationship with yourself by Milena Goleva
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Why is this happening? Because the one who talks behind others' backs is a complex person.
He is insecure and unstable. Such a person needs, by means of others and spitting on them, to be able to rise a little higher in the eyes of the interlocutor and in his own eyes. These are people who need to raise their own self-esteem and relieve their own complexes. When someone steps on someone else's authority to elevate themselves, one day they will step on yours. Especially if it's close friends. For people who have shared intimate things. People who have revealed themselves and trusted. If he tells you that. Expect him to do the same to you when you're not around. When he's behind your back.
This is valid in all spheres of communication.
And in relationships employer-employee. And in husbands. And in friendly relationships. Two people are separated and begin to slander each other behind their backs. Or in professional relationships. I happened to be interviewing a person who wanted to teach at the yoga studio. I always ask why you want to leave the previous place. It often happens that these people speak to me against the previous yoga studios where they taught or the colleagues there. I never take people like that. Now you understand why.
People! Keep your friends safe! Protect everyone you interact with!
Protect their dignity! Protect their self-esteem! Guard their face! Don't allow yourself to betray them just to please someone or boost your self-esteem. Sooner or later it will be known.
This is so often observed here in Bulgaria. It's like we're too insecure people. And it's as if we really need to step on foreign authorities in order to be able to elevate ourselves. Read also: Envy - the silent thief!
However! Whenever someone talks behind another's back, he is talking about the attitude that he himself provoked in the other.
When you yourself start with the third person and fate meets you with him, you see that he is very nice and likeable. Or to put it in other words: Whenever someone speaks to you against another, they are actually always speaking only and only against himself.
And what's more: when someone talks behind someone else's back, a light bulb always goes off in me that there is something rotten in the person himself.
See more: When someone insults you and tries to humiliate you
Run away from those who talk behind others' backs!
Because! Life is wonderful!
Author Milena Goleva
Milena Goleva is the author and host of a collection of 20 author guided meditations. Check out the collection here: milenagoleva.com It is the last project online yoga studio, in which yoga and meditation are practiced by people from more than 35 countries and 420 locations around the world. You can find the online yoga studio here: milenagoleva.com Milena is the creator of Yoga Place studios, a motivator, speaker, workshop leader, change inspirer and has helped thousands of people on their transformation journey.
The texts and articles that I publish here are authored and subject to copyright, so please, if you quote them, mention the author and give a link to the original, thank you in advance for your correctness.
Learn more about the author's collection of guided meditations in Bulgarian by Milena Goleva here: https://milenagoleva.com
You can find video materials with free up-to-date techniques, practices and tips from Milena Goleva on her YouTube channel here.
